


Burden of Proof

by JunoInferno



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Exhibitionism, F/M, Near Future Fic, and some other stuff i'll add if i need to, s5 somehow resolved, there will be a sex tape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-10
Updated: 2015-11-10
Packaged: 2018-04-30 22:10:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5181494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JunoInferno/pseuds/JunoInferno
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A night out with Belle's friends reveals that Storybrooke is under the impression she and her husband don't have a sex life. This accusation makes her livid and she sets out to show them just how wrong they are.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Burden of Proof

**Author's Note:**

> This story wouldn't be possible without the help of the tumblr Rumbellers. It's also open to prompts/suggestions/etc and dedicated to anyone who thinks our ship can't handle porn. Happy reading!

  
It started out like any other girls’ night out. Belle hadn’t been crazy about going out with Ashley, but the princess had enough sense or good grace not to bring up selling her first born- though Belle might have pointed out some things about that transaction... She was Ruby’s friend and the four had gone out with the intent of giving the two mothers a night off. That hadn’t stopped the women from going on about nothing but their children for at least an hour before enough alcohol got in them to get Aurora talking.

“Philip and I never have sex anymore...” she complained.

Ruby choked on her drink a little.

“It’s just the baby,” said Aurora. “I shouldn’t complain.”

“Phil’s fifteen months,” said Ashley. “When was the last time you had sex?”

Aurora looked up trying to see far into the past.

“Oh, honey,” said Ruby. “If you have to think that hard, it’s been too long.”

Belle nodded silently even though no one was looking at her. Though her marriage had certainly been no easy path, that part had never been an issue. It was never that they had not loved each other or desired each other- which she knew for certain now-, it was always that circumstance or darkness or doubt had gotten in the way.

“Have you tried making a schedule?,” asked Ashley. “Sean and I have a schedule.”

Belle tried to hide her judgment, but Ruby was more vocal. She gave a loud snort, “Yeah, that sounds romantic.”

“Well, what ideas do you have?,” asked Ashley.

Ruby turned to Aurora. “You need to buy some lingerie and just jump him. No guy turns down sex.”

“What if he’s tired?,” Ashley complained.

Belle couldn’t stand this anymore. Amateurs.

“Have you tried doing it somewhere new?,” she asked.

The three women turned to stare at Belle like she had a third eye.

“What?,” asked Aurora.

“Well, sometimes you stop something because it’s boring. You don’t necessarily have to do it in a new place...” though she certainly took the opportunity as much as possible, she finished silently. “You could use a new position.”

Ashley frowned at Belle. “And how would you know?”

Belle was stunned at the question. How would she know? Wasn’t it obvious?

Ruby surprised Belle again by answering on her behalf. “She reads everything.”

“No.” Ruby looked at her curiously. “Well, yes, I do read everything, but that isn’t why. Rumple and I try new positions all the time.”

Ashley eyed her.

“Belle, it’s okay,” said Ruby. “I mean you don’t have to pretend.”

Belle shook her head. “What am I pretending about?”

“You know, the sex. I mean, I get it. Your relationship isn’t about physical stuff.”

Her jaw might have dropped. “Rumple and I have sex.”

Aurora shook her head. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up. We were all having a good time...”

Ashley nodded. “We can change the subject.”

Their backpedaling only served to make Belle more livid. “I have sex!”

“Okay, Belle...” said Ruby.

“Yeah, whatever you say,” said Ashley.

“I’m not making anything up! I have a lot of sex! In fact, he woke me up this morning by eating me out!”

“It’s okay. Relationships aren’t about sex,” Aurora reassured her.

“Of course yours isn’t! You haven’t had any in over a year!”

“Belle, come on, we know your relationship is all about seeing past appearances,” Ruby added.

“We get it. He’s not attractive, but you don’t care,” said Ashley.

“Not attractive?!,” Belle shouted. “Are you serious?!”

“Uh, yeah,” said Ashley.

“Just because you don’t find someone attractive doesn’t mean that we all have to share the same opinion!” Belle stood and picked up her purse.

“Belle, come on,” said Ruby. “Sit down, have another drink.”

In her head, Belle thought up a moving speech about respecting each others’ differences, passion reaching exquisite heights when it was physical, mental and emotional, but instead what came out was...

“We have sex!,” said Belle, turning on her heel to walk away. “Lots!”

* * *

 

“Belle.”

She turned to see her husband as he approached from the living room. “Hey.”

“I thought you were spending the evening with your friends?”

Belle shrugged off her coat as Rumple moved to put it on the hook for her.

“I wasn’t having a very good time.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. I know you’d been looking forward to it. You certainly deserved a night out.”

“Well, it wasn’t much fun.”

His hands landed on her shoulders, kneading them as he leaned down to kiss her neck.

“Can I help?”

Belle smiled. “You usually do.”

* * *

 

Somewhere in the bliss that followed three orgasms, Belle decided she didn’t need anyone else to believe her sex life. After all, she and Rumple were the only ones participating in it. Let the others suffer in their boring sex lives with schedules and... probably missionary? Belle decided it would be a good idea to ride her husband for a morning quickie just to make sure she didn’t share their fate.

She happily went on with her day at the library only breaking to share lunch with Rumple. She had a bright spot at the end helping Roland and Henry choose new books, but then realized she was late and still needed to pick up some things from the Dark Star Pharmacy.

She went down the aisles, picking out what she needed and finally came upon Ruby and Ashley in the feminine care aisle. The pair grew silent as she approached.

“Belle,” said Ruby. “We were just talking about last night.”

“Yeah, we want to apologize.”

Belle straightened, certain she was going to finally get the treatment she deserved.

“Yeah, we didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable with all the sex stuff.”

“What?,” asked Belle.

“The sex talk,” said Ruby. “I mean it’s not like it’s the most important thing.”

“I am not uncomfortable with sex,” said Belle. “I could talk about sex all day long. I could have sex all day long. I have had sex all day long.”

“Belle, come on,” said Ruby.

“I don’t know where you all got the idea that I can’t handle sex,” said Belle. “Or that I’m not physically attracted to my husband. Have you seen his ass in leather pants? Ashley, come on, I know you’ve seen his ass in leather pants.”

The women frowned at her.

“We have sex all the time.” Belle looked up to find that she had stopped for this conversation in the reproductive health aisle. She was smack dab in front of an assortment of sexual health aids. “Actually, yes, this is what I was coming to get.”

Ruby crossed her arms and Ashley rolled her eyes. Belle used her arm to sweep the whole shelf of lube into her basket. 

“Belle, seriously, honey...” said Ruby.

“And condoms, I’ll just take these, we can leave the small ones...”

“This is getting sad,” Ashley mumbled.

“You know what’s sad, Ashley? Scheduling sex.” Belle threw her arms up, letting a few boxes of condoms flail from her hands and one smack into Mother Superior. “There, I said it. Do you have a magnet on the fridge you flip over so you know who gets to be on top? Or does that not change?”

She turned around to face the nun. “Mother Superior.”

* * *

  
Belle stormed home and deposited her purchases on the kitchen table. Rumple was preparing dinner and looked down at her purchases.

“Did we have plans?”

“There was a sale,” Belle said quickly, the boxes of condoms and lubricants bursting out onto the table.

He nodded and seemed to accept that lame excuse. Belle walked over to where Rumple had set up a tiny television.

“You can turn it off,” he said. “I’m just used to the background noise.”

“No, it’s fine,” said Belle. “Isn’t this those sisters?”

“The Kardashians.” He shrugged. “I suppose I got accustomed to watching them when I didn’t require sleep. They do seem to be on all hours of the day.”

Belle frowned. “What is it they do?”

“No one is certain, though I do recall that one of them was made famous by a sex tape of some sort.”

Belle looked up at Rumple. “A sex tape?”

He furrowed his brow at her and nodded. Rumple went about preparing dinner as the wheels in Belle’s head turned.

A sex tape. That was something she and Rumple hadn’t done before and if her doubters happened to steal a glance...

Well, that would be proof of their sex life, wouldn’t it? 


End file.
